Bring me back for round two

I have been highly hesitant to actually write this post, seeing as the last time we all did fitness goals, they didn't last all that long (minus Bri) and this blog just kinda...failed...

About two weeks ago, Bri sent a group text to Elle and myself, asking for some fitness ideas. We spent a good hour or so exchanging ideas, before we decided that we would try out the whole "keeping each other accountable" thing again. This time, we've texted each other at the end of the day with a report of everything we ate, and all the exercise we did.

I honestly can't tell you how nice it is to feel accountable to someone. There are some days where I'm ashamed to text Bri and tell her what I ate and how little I worked out. But there are other days that I just feel like a proud mama bird, with all of my accomplishments of the day, paying off.

Living on my own, I have a lot of control over what I eat. However, I also get tempted easily to just eat junk. I work a lot, so fast food is such an easy option. Way too easy.

Another reason keeping myself accountable to Bri is that it keeps me from indulging in my old ways.

For the past 9 months or so, I have struggled with anorexia. Every time I (think I) beat it, I relapse. It has been a real struggle. And one question that would be posed is, "well...if you're anorexic...how come you're not skinnier?" which is a totally valid question. The problem arises when I don't eat for a day or so, and then I binge eat. It's so easy to feel justified in eating a ton of junk when you haven't eaten for 24+ hours. But then you feel bad all over again and it starts over. It's a vicious cycle.

When you're putting your body into starvation mode every day, your body stores fat more easily. So, you may lose a few pounds if you don't eat for a day or so, but then as soon as you eat, you'll gain that back, because your body doesn't know when it will get a chance to eat again.

So. As I do my very best to beat this, it is so nice to be accountable to someone. I feel guilty every time I update Bri on the daily eatings and I leave out a meal or two.

The easiest way that I have found to beat this, is to count calories. Normally, I would be against this. But it's so nice to see a visual representation, so I can see when I'm feeding my body well enough, and so I can see how good I'm being and how far I've come from where I was 9 months ago.

And so, (on good days) I will be posting recipes, per Bri's request, complete with caloric content.

And trust me. I'm a poor college student. All the recipes will be way easy and way affordable.